One time my friend Emily, my sister Liana and I were walking down the street from our house when a large Hispanic man drove past in a large beat up blue car. After passing us he quickly turned around and started to follow us. We of course ran and ended up in another friends green house where we could look out and see the street without being seen. We saw him circle and circle and circle the block. Finally when he was gone we ran home and called the police- who did nothing.
Now when a car passes me while I going for my morning walk I look over my shoulder to make sure they dont turn around. If they do, I pretend to be going up the drive way to a house. Now this fear might stem from what happend when I was little, it might be hightened because I am now a Mother and want to protect my son from anything. But it also might be becasue I watch all of these stories on the news that happen to other people who say, "it will never happen to me." My mind is constantly filled with the fear of someone breaking into my house, of someone trying to get into my car while I am at a stoplight or of someone trying to harm me while I go for my morning walk. I try to think of everything I would do to get out of the grips of a bad guy. I have my phone in my pocket at all times incase something like this happens. I lock my bedroom door when I am blowdrying my hair. I know Im crazy!!
I recently watched the Primetime story of Jaycee Dugard and her horrendous nightmare of being kidnapped and held for 18 years. She told Diane Sawyer that when the car pulled up beside her she thought they were just going to ask for direcections but next thing she new she was being tazed and shoved into a van. I was thinking of this exact instance when Tyson and I were walking today-right about then I heard a car slowly pulling up behind me. I jumped to the side taking Tyson along with me. An older man and woman pulled up and asked me where the School was and I couldn't help but continue to think of the primetime show. I started to think of everything I would do incase this man's door started to open, just then I then saw a couple of giddy kids in the backseat who I could see were very excited and all dressed to go play at the playground. I felt guilty for thinking about this while these people were honestly just trying to find the park. Although my mind will probably still be filled with these thoughts- and I think to a point it is good to be aware of things that could happen- I think I will stop watching as many of these stories on the news so that my mind isn't taken over by these thoughts.
You know, I'd rather make the mistake of being too cautious than the mistake of being too complacent. We live in a crazy world.
ReplyDelete